In a rather unpleasant comment thread over at Volokh, some guy writes:
A lot of women who opt for a sperm donor instead of husband do not realize the extent to which they play “genetic roulette.” There’s a very good reason for courtship. You get to know the person who will contribute half the genes to your children. Genes matter. We are not blank slates, and a great deal of our personality, abilities and health are genetically determined. You should also know your mate’s family (as well as your own) because that’s the gene pool your children are going to get. In the past a person’s family counted for a lot. Prior generations knew that a family riddled by physical and mental problems (like substance abuse) was a poor choice to marry into. How well you relate to your children, especially after they grow up, is also influenced by genes. It’s amazing that these women who won’t “settle” like the author, and who put such are priority on children are all too willing to settle for a spin of the generic roulette wheel.
This was true at some point very early in the history of artificial insemination, though as far as I know, women have never been eager to inject themselves with random sperm. I would argue that women are more, not less, attentive to genetic makeup when they’re trolling through extensive online catalogs of sperm donors, simply because they zero in on those traits most obviously heritable: height, eye color, race, intelligence, medical history (yes, you are obviously informed as to the medical history of the man from whom you are purchasing genetic material). I may not worry much about the height of my mate, but I would probably choose a tall sperm donor given the advantages we know that tall people enjoy all their lives. (I would have to, actually, because short sperm donors are so unpopular that they typically aren’t solicited for sperm.) Women are likely to look for shared culture in a partner–someone who shares their values, perhaps, or is well traveled, or well versed in classical music. We can argue to what extent any attribute signals a particular genetic makeup (He loves Pynchon! So will Junior!), but some assumptions are more justified than others. And while some women may be looking for a good father–say, a guy who has the time to spend changing diapers rather than an overworked investment banker–that’s quite a different quest than the search for good genes.
The simple, undeniable truth is that your average American sperm donor has a much, much more desirable genetic makeup than your average American man. They are more attractive, more intelligent, and have less prevalence for crippling disease. They tend to be well-rounded; the famed Nobel Prize Sperm Bank failed largely because women don’t want children who succeed along only a single dimension. They want scholar athletes, it seems, not just scholars.
Perhaps we should castigate women who settle for their partners’ sperm, since we make all sorts of compromises for our partners that we would never make when purchasing gametes. I wouldn’t care much if my boyfriend’s immediate family were hideously ugly, or if he and I both carried Tay-Sachs, or if he needed inch-thick glasses to recognize me. I’d demand more from a sperm donor.
Thanks for writing about this important topic. I have two children via anonymous sperm donor. I researched donors extensively to find those who were very healthy. It makes sense to give my children a good start in that area and hope they inherit more good than bad. One challenge that has arisen, though, is that men often donate when they are in college and many health issues don’t arise until much later in life. Then, it is difficult to find the offspring, or for the bank to even stay in touch with the donor. I recently started a non-profit organization to help keep track of donor and offspring health issues, anonymously and for free. Donor Offspring Health has a website where people can share their health information and where people considering specific donors can search to see if health issues have been reported. This is an important step forward in maintaining health records for donor conceived.
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